No pain No Gain they say!! Well I would have to be getting some gain with the way I’m feeling atm. My heads fine the body no so fine, feeling the soreness atm, but it’s a good soreness if that makes sense.
I can see the light at the end of the tunnel, I may or may not have been classed as a whinger today at my PT session, but that’s life.
Carrying 200kgs plus about isn’t good for anyone and we all know it isn’t good for our body in any type of way.
They early morning walks are good, but today I wasn’t able to get out and do what I have been doing previously, I think that this is just one of these things that my Trainer meant when he said baby steps first.
I’m humbled by the people commenting me on my facebook about this journey, its warming and up lifting to know that people really do care. I don’t go looking for this, nor do I think many people would.
Being a part of something that is going to change my whole life is exciting, but yet also extremely scary in many ways. I look at the power of positive thinking and having a Positive attitude. We only get one life and very really do we get any do overs in life.
Part of this process is better understanding myself and how my body works. Listening to my body and what it is trying to tell me. Speaking with part of Team Tempo my Dietician Fiona and working on changing my eating habits, I learn a lot about the damage I had been doing to myself.
The Pies, Sausage Rolls, Chocolate and my weakness KFC all a part of my weekly staple of foods, yes I will freely admit I would eat these and other things like Hot Chips of a regular basis.
I have a major food problem, I would not be able to open a packet of Let’s say Double Coat Tim Tams without eating the whole packet. I would By a Large Chips and eat them all myself.
While I would also eat other things throughout the days as well, these foods would only serve as an enabler to my addiction Bad Foods. I am and have become Addicted to those fatty and Sugary foods.
Did you know it would take 24 hours of walking to Burn of 1 and a Third Tim Tam, yet I would eat a whole packet. 1 Meat Pie contains more calories than an average weeks allowed calories. I would eat 2 in one sitting and if not at least 4 a week.
Why did I do this to myself, this is an answer I hope to discover along my way. Let me tell you about the feeling it is to be inside prison that is my body. Most people enjoy life, they enjoy getting out and socialising, they enjoy being invited to Weddings, Parties or whatever it is, I used to love this, but not anymore, I don’t even go out for dinner much with my family when asked, not because I don’t like them, it’s because I don’t feel comfortable within the body I am.
I often think about things and wonder what my life would be like without the burden on my obesity. I now know I will one day soon find out what this is like. We all do things for one reason or another.
Do I need a reason bigger than saving my own life to motivate me to really do this, I don’t think so. I feel part of my journey will be the personal discovery within myself, finding out just who I’m and beginning to love the person within and stop hating the person I have become.
I won’t ever shy away from the current me, I won’t ever forget the current person I am, cause for all the bad parts that I look like to many, at the core I am always and will always be me.
My life is a story and I want to tell my story, I want to be able to motivate not only me but a nation of other struggling people, I want to be able to show my journey and inspire other to make this change to bring better life and happiness into their world.
I don’t think I have ever realised fully how much I truly have to live for, I have to let the negatives go, I am human I will make mistakes, some of my mistake bigger than others and some just plain and simply dumb. But I think they have helped build a strong character within me.
I’m trying to find a purpose and balance, Sport has always been there for me, Rightly or Wrongly I have also made mistakes within sport and paid the ultimate sacrifice at times also, I won’t ever hide form this. I have more to give, than they can and ever will take from me.
My day now starts with me looking myself in the mirror and being honest with the reflection I see, The person I will be and the person I have always been, Loving, genuine, caring and compassionate, without fail I will always live from now till I die with the knowledge I gave myself a genuine crack at life, not a life hidden any longer behind a wall of darkness and a life of hurt and pain.
This is My Story, My Journey, My saving Grace. I am Jason and forever will be free.
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